HAPPY BIRTHDAY & MERRY CHRISTMAS


December was a very busy month around here. Gramma Patty came for two glorious weeks.

Vanessa squirreled her away for hours, locked behind closed doors, pretending away, Gramma wearing whatever dress-up outfit Vanessa dreamed up. I got so much done, the first few days, I gleefully put together lunches on our giant golden tray and delivered it to their room, saying, "No, no, don't stop, just enjoy your lunch." And, with a wink to my mom and a little grin, I was back to getting things done around the house. Keenan was either entertained by the girl play, or helped me do chores. He is an easy-to-please kind of guy.

One of the first things we did to Gramma Patty was put her on the preschool float in the local holiday parade. Our float won a prize! We saw Santa, we baked cookies, we put up the tree, we hung lights, we sang Christmas carols. And then, just before Gramma was to leave, we threw Vanessa's first official birthday party for friends.

Vanessa had told me she wanted her own room for her 4th birthday, painted purple. She also said she wanted a "rainbow birthday with a red cake and a pinata filled with horses." Too bad the child can't be more specific. Well, I'll be darned if we didn't consider that fantasy a roughed out to-do list.

Maybe it was the guilt for her being so precipitously close to Christmas, ensuring everyone's schedule would forever more be too full for a birthday party. Or maybe it was because we had never had a true birthday party for her in four years, like our peers throw for their miracle children. Jack being the youngest of seven and me the youngest of five means we were raised to feel like royalty when our birthdays were noticed, and we had a cake with candles and several (rarely all) family members present. There is a photo of me on my first birthday - albeit dim and rather out of focus - and another on my 13th birthday. That's it for birthday photos. Jack's family completely forgot his birthday one year. So, um, doing it up big for Vanessa was a stretch for us.

So, fearing no parent would carve out time in the middle of a precious December weekend day for a 4 year old's birthday party, we scheduled an dinner time "drop off" party, so parents could shop or date or whatever parents do without kids (I've forgotten), on Monday, December 13th.

I found a traditional, Mexican horse pinata for $15 that was literally taller than Vanessa and filled it with candy, trinkets, and toy horses. Daddio put a hook square in the middle of the living room ceiling to hang it. We ordered a princess castle bounce house for $100, strung lights all over the backyard, and asked "Auntie Shea-Shea," and her beau Dan to help manage the crowds. Daddio made several sandwiches - PBJ, tuna, turkey and cream cheese - and cut them in quarters, diagonally. We put out carrots, cucumbers, grapes, watermelon, boiled shrimp, sushi, pesto tortellini, and bacon (Matthew's request).

Instead of birthday cake, we arranged for the Good Humor man to come in his ice cream truck. All the party guests ran outside clutching a dollar bill to make their order and march off with an ice cream. The Good Humor man handed back the ones and gave me the real bill - $24.

Vanessa is at the age where she was really, really into getting and opening gifts, especially toys. On the invitation, I mentioned that re-gifts and hand-me-downs were encouraged. She just needed something to open! She had a blast.

After it was all done, Daddio and I felt our inner party meisters were reawakened. "We throw parties!" we said, staring at each other with silly grins on our faces. We have been out of practice, having little kids and all.

Gramma Patty babysat the kids with Sara Klein - the person who could go the distance with Vanessa when she was a "colicky" infant - so we could have an evening out for Jack's work party. Gramma had to hold Keenan when he began to wonder where I was, then walked all through the house looking for me. He cried and she just held him, rocking, until he stopped. Sara played with Vanessa. When we got home, nervous things had gone poorly, everybody was happy!

Vanessa's preschool had a wonderful Christmas production, with singing.

Keenan and I went out Christmas shopping and were mobbed by Keenan fans. In fact, we met a child model casting agent and then a children's photographer, Melissa Hogan, in Wal-Mart and exchanged numbers.

Then, well, we all got sick. First Vanessa, then Keenan and I at the exact same hour, then, to a lesser degree, Daddio. It was all very dramatic. Later we learned the stomach flu had been going around Vanessa's preschool class, that's why some classmates couldn't attend her party. The rest of 'em, including Miss Carmen and Vanessa, got it Saturday at 6 pm, where ever they were.

Granny Ernestine arrived with Uncle Mike just in time to celebrate Vanessa's real birthday on December 22nd. It was very low key, in comparison, and our newly minted 4 year old was, well, confused. "I already had my birthday," she pointed out. This night we sang her Happy Birthday, even little Keenan.



We got a surprise visit from Aunt Betty and cousins David, Theresa and Winston. We didn't get to see them at Uncle Wally's memorial service due to the flu. They could only stay a few minutes, but we all felt we could spend hours and hours and days and days together.

We had a quiet, homey Christmas, and, unfortunately, poor Uncle Mike got the same sickness we all had a week before: he spent the whole holiday in Vanessa's new room, under several blankets, or in the bathroom.

Keenan and Vanessa had lots and lots of gifts under the tree.

Daddio had to take the last two weeks of the year off, or lose some of his accumulated vacation. He got the flu and then it rained the whole time. We spent Christmas couped up inside while it flooded outside. The kids got off their eating and sleeping schedules and were overstimulated and hopped up on sweets. So Granny, Jack and I buried ourselves in hours and hours of playing Yahtzee. It was exhilarating!

When Granny and Uncle Mike were scheduled to leave, Mike was still too sick, so he stayed an extra day. That extra day was great, since he was up and about and Vanessa tried to take care of him and even teased him a little. It was quality bonding time for both of them.



And then, to finalize our year, we had a small New Year's Eve party with just Jen and AJ as our guests. The disco ball was on and music playing, but the party ended early. Ah, preschoolers. I was the only one up at midnight.

And as I reflect on the end of this year, with a one year old and a four year old in our life, my new year's resolution is to be more present, all the time, and not let myself tune out or try to mentally escape when I get run down. It's not reflected in my blog - except perhaps that I haven't been able to update the blog frequently - but Vanessa's third year was quite challenging for me. Although I understood she is going through a developmental phase of needing to test action and reaction - as I told Miss Carmon one exasperating day, "Vanessa is a social scientist and I am her favorite experiment" - knowing it and enduring it are two very different things. I'm pooped from the Talk-Back Threes! Wow!